My family is a homeschooling family and that often puts us in the spot light for many questions. Sometimes the questions are warranted questions about the how and what's of homeschooling. But more often the question are "interesting" to say the least. This week I received one from a local high school student. "When are you ever going to send them to REAL school?" and "How will they make friends being home schooled?". Those two question have led me to a lot of thinking on the subject this week so now I'm ready to explain my feelings on the subject.
Before I share though please allow me to state this: I am not saying that you must home school or that its the only way to go. What I do tell people is that as responsible, loving parents we should all spend some time thinking about, praying about and researching the education options available to us. The Bible tells us it is the parents responsibility to teach the children the ways of God and life. However it is chosen to do so should not be based on what is easy, what is excepted by those around us or what is common practice but on what is best for the children to receive a good, well rounded education. An education that fills them with knowledge, good character, citizenship, job skills, an understanding of responsibility and a love of learning new things (because they will be required to do so the rest of their lives). That list puts a lot of responsibility for a child's future on the parents, where it should be, not on the teachers, principals or government.
Now on to the answer to those two questions.
First, "When do you plan to send your children to REAL school"?
A dictionary is such a wonderful tool in life and finding out the true definitions of words can take you a long way!
REAL: Actually existing as a thing or occurring fact; not imagined or supposed. Actual, true, genuine, factual
I'm sure if you asked my oldest son if he did 'real' or 'imaginary' school work today he would say REAL and for proof show it to you. He would describe real as the spelling test he took, English papers, reading, math, geology science and Roman history that he did today as "REAL".
Now I'm sure that isn't the 'real' this high-schooler was speaking of. No to her school isn't WHAT you learn (education) as it is to me but a building like the one across from our home that 100's of children file into each morning. But is the building REALLY the school? By definition, NO!
SCHOOL: An institution for educating children; to educated, train, teach, instruct and discipline
By definition a school can be anywhere and anything a child is doing to be educated, trained, taught, instructed and disciplined!
The third definition I will give sums up what "school" should be.
EDUCATION: The process of receiving and giving instruction and knowledge; training, instruction, upbringing and nurture.
The last two synonyms listed there are very interesting when thinking about public schools: upbringing and nurture? Something to think about in itself!
On to the second question, "How will they make friends being home schooled"? First, who said the only place to make friends was at a public school, surrounded by only kids of your age?
I was blessed to be home schooled through part of my young education years and I will report to you that I had many friends. My friends were from a variety of place and a variety of ages. Like most I had friends of the family type: siblings, cousins (who are still some of my best friends today), aunts, uncles and grandparents (who had profound effects on my life like none other and gave me a huge respect for the elders around me). From there my list grows: church friends, neighborhood children, neighborhood elderly, Scout friends, piano class friends, 4H friends, gymnastic friends, Home school group friends, mission trip friends and many more.
The same is becoming true for my own school age children who are only seven and four. Between them they have developed friendships with each other, cousins, aunts, uncles, in our neighborhood, our church, their grandparents church, our home school co-op group, scouts, dance, gymnastics, swimming, tee ball, flag football, soccer and basketball. Because of this my children are learning how to interact with children and adults of all ages and interests which will help them in the REAL world of work and life unlike being couped up with only children their own age for the entire school year.
Both of these children have one very close friend and many friends they love to spend time with. As parents, my husband and I have been decidedly proactive in allowing our children to be involved in things they are interested in. Sadly I have seen home school and non-home school families alike not involve their children in anything and keep to themselves to much. The children grow up with little to none social skills making it hard to further their education, make friends and get jobs. I have found that both sets of children have things they struggle with and parents from both sides make mistakes...none of us our perfect.
One sure fire way to grow a child who is friendly, personable and kind is to be one yourself! They will learn what you teach them and if that is nothing, that is what you'll get. To be a friend and have friends you must show yourself friendly!
Well these are only two of the questions that get asked often. Maybe these answers will help calm your own doubts or satisfy some curiosity. The question of REAL school to me is are my children learning, growing in knowledge and with a curiosity of the world around them? Are they gaining skills that will help them their entire lives? Are they getting hands on skills that will be useful to them? Are my kids growing in wisdom, grace, strong character and love? I'm happy to keep them out of a crowed school, where one on one education is hard to come by, where my child may 'slip through the cracks', and where they may not even find safety. I feel burden for the teachers with so much pressure on them to bring up perfect students when so many parents aren't helping them, where they are not aloud to give a moral rule to be followed or discipline when wrong is done. How frustrating it must be. For them I pray often. I also for our education choice often! I pray for wisdom and guidance. I pray that God shows me as the mother he has put over these child, what each of the individually needs. As we should all be in constant prayer for our own children.
Our school might not look like yours but REAL SCHOOL EDUCATION is happening here!
Blessings to all of you!
~Rachel~
